How To Get The Truth From a Narcissist

Narcissists live in a carefully constructed fake world and will use many manipulation techniques to keep you from seeking the truth.

Candace Ranee Moon
5 min readAug 9, 2022


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The truth and a narcissist are not something any of us would ever put together. The most common MO of a narcissist is pathological lying. They construct a house of cards around themselves that they use to interact with the world. Their use of gaslighting and deception to protect their lies makes it very difficult to interact with them in any meaningful way.

The narcissists’ very existence is a lie and they are terrified of showing their true face.

Narcissists perceive their feelings as facts. If they think something is wrong, they don’t understand this is just a thought. To them, it’s their truth, and because they believe that truth 100%, they don’t recognize it to be distorted.

Narcissists may seem arrogant and overconfident, but that facade is really hiding a very fragile false self.

Their false self is what they use to try and fulfill the functions of a healthy ego, but it’s not a complete identity, and therefore, they use it to extract what they need from other people to feel good about themselves.

To keep their grandiose false self going they need you to support their lie by praising them and supporting them.

This becomes almost impossible to continue once you figure out they are a liar and who they pretend to be doesn't even exist. You’re confused and depressed because every time you think everything is OK there is more falsehoods and untruths spewing from them.

You don’t know what to do.

You just want a truthful answer to your question. You just want an honest dialog without the constant deflection and gaslighting. You just want a real discussion instead of their perpetual blame shifting and victimhood.

With a narcissist, wanting simple things like the truth is a tall order.

Narcissists live with the constant fear of being exposed. To avoid that, they will go to almost any means to manipulate others into seeing them as superior. In order to deal with someone like that, you have to…



Candace Ranee Moon

Candace is a Sociologist, Writer, DV Survivor, and Trauma-Informed Coach.